The Wager
by Imagine Anne Morgan
Summary: Another chapter in the bitter rivalry between South Park and Middle Park sees the students of South Park elementary going to Middle Park for a football game. Mayor McDaniels urges the team to win because she doesn't want to be on the losing end of a bet that would see her publicly humiliated.
1. Chapter 1

The Wager:

On a sunny afternoon at the football field in the small mountainous community of South Park Colorado a group of school-aged children had gathered to practice for the upcoming rivalry game against Middle Park. Things had started to return to normal after Randy Bratt was captured and his keytar destroyed. Alex McDaniels had replaced him as their football coach and Dovahkiin Hughes' father Denny Hughes had replaced Randy on council.

"This is the rivalry game against Middle Park." Officer McDaniels launched into a motivational pep talk to get them fired up. "I don't need to remind you how important it is for us to send those assholes home with their tails between their legs."

Stan couldn't wait for the big game against Middle Park. He was sure that the Middle Park school principal was still pissed off at his Uncle Jimbo for blowing up their mascot.

"Those assholes don't stand a chance!" He announced enthusiastically.

During their practice game Mayor McDaniels – now running South Park as Mayor Barbrady since her relationship with the Police Chief was exposed to the community – arrived with PC Principal to check on progress. She hadn't been seen in public much recently because she was six months pregnant with another set of twins and suffered severe morning sickness.

He spotted her talking with Officer McDaniels and PC Principal. "Whoa dude!" He exclaimed when he noticed how large she'd become in pregnancy.

"She's fucking huge!" Kenny mumbled through his hood.

"Don't say that too loud!" Dovahkiin Hughes snapped at them. "My dad says she gets pissed off if you do."

They could see her glowering at them from across the field. "That isn't helping us win the game!" She snapped at them.

"I fucking told you!" Dovahkiin said fearfully.

XXXX

"What's the deal with Middle Park bro?"PC Principal asked curiously as he watched over the practice game.

"It's a long time rivalry. South Park and Middle Park have hated each other since the dawn of time. Doesn't matter who's in charge of either town they still find a way to hate each other."Alex explained. "Not to mention their police chief has the hots for mom."

She rolled her eyes at her son. He was on thin ice for bringing that up. She wasn't looking forward to going to Middle Park. She didn't want to go to the black tie events or talk about the unity that didn't exist between the two towns. She sighed with exasperation when she realised PC Principal was looking for an explanation. "He's just another scumbag."She explained bitterly. "Every time I have to interact with him he's staring at my chest."

She wished she didn't admit that. The last thing she wanted to do was face their police chief who would be drooling over her the minute she set foot in their town. His sleazy and ambitious personality reminded her of Him. The memories of the attempted rape were still fresh in her mind as though they happened yesterday. The flash backs and dreams were so vivid it was as though the attack was happening again. A wave of nausea had her leaning on PC Principal for support.

"Mom? Are you okay?" Alex asked with concern as she looked green in the face.

The school children were laughing when she couldn't get away from PC Principal in time. She'd thrown up all over PC Principal just like she had done with Randy Marsh when she was pregnant with her first set of twins.

"Dude!"Eric Cartman laughed hysterically with the other children. "That's the fucking sweetest thing I've ever seen!"

"Oh God!"She was mortified. Randy Marsh deserved it. PC Principal was a friend. "I-I'm sorry. Peter, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay bro."To her surprise he wasn't angry at her. He remained calm even though he was covered in puke. "You're pregnant Mary, you can't help the morning sickness. You look tired. You should go home and rest."

Alex cut the training session short and drove her home. She could hardly tolerate motion and spent the rest of the trip home coiled in a ball clutching a vomit bag. The morning sickness was one thing she didn't miss about being pregnant.

XXXX

They were preparing to leave for Middle Park and it was no secret that she dreaded the trip. Nausea overwhelmed her. She tried to put on her best game face for the children as PC Principal and Principal Victoria along with Mr. Mackey made sure everyone was accounted for. Her stomach churned and her face turned green as she dashed behind the bus to throw up.

Eric Cartman spotted her and approached with a mischievous grin plastered on his chubby face. "You had the pop tarts for breakfast, hah Mayor?"

She glowered at him. "What are you looking at?" It was bad enough she'd blown chunks everywhere she didn't need the little fat kid pointing it out. He backed away from her and ran off to find his friends as PC Principal ordered all children – football players and cheerleaders to the front of the bus.

"Alright everyone, let's move!" Principal Victoria shouted at the children who lined up to board the bus. The school board gave her back her job when they found out it was Mr. Mackey who got her fired. They didn't want to get rid of PC Principal as he was effective in running the school so they decided they should run the school together as co-principals.

She wondered how the Middle Park school officials would react to PC Principal especially when he went on a war path.

"Wait until those Middle Park losers get a load of PC Principal." The Marsh boy was saying to his friends as they boarded the bus. She wasn't the only one wondering.

"Those posers are gonna shit their pants." Pete added as he got in the car. He wanted to ride the bus originally, but it was packed with kids from the football team and the cheer squad. South Park had a new cheerleader. Katherine Holloway had moved to South Park with her family from Australia. She added to the congestion on the bus.

The convoy had Johnson and Freddy in front travelling in a council car, Alex would follow them and take her family in her SUV, the South Park City Council and some of the chaperoning parents followed her in a council owned bus and the school bus travelled along behind.

XXXX

As she predicted she couldn't stand the motion. She tried to tell the Middle Park officials that she was sick and not up to the trip. They didn't listen to her and demanded her presence. She didn't understand their insistence when all they were going to do was fight about which town was superior.

"For God's sake Alex, slow down!" She demanded. Every time he rounded a corner or the road zigzagged through the mountains she wanted to throw up. She wasn't prepared for it, but Alex swerved to avoid a deer as Johnson and Freddie radioed to warn him it was standing in the middle of the road and not about to move despite the oncoming convoy. She couldn't keep it in and threw up all over the back seat.

Pete scooted away from her as far as he could go. "Aunt Mary, sick!"

She scowled at him. "It's morning sickness!" She clutched her stomach as another wave of nausea had her burying her head between her knees. "Alex, pull over!"

Alex radioed the buses to stop. She got out and bolted for the railing. Barbrady comforted her while she threw up on the side of the road.

XXXX

"She doesn't look so good." Kenny mumbled through his hood. The children watched as the Mayor of South Park threw up on the side of the road.

"Is she going to make the trip?" Stan wondered.

"Just leave me here to die!" They heard her yelling at Police Chief Barbrady and PC Principal who were trying to make her feel better.

"We're going to be here a while." The new girl Katherine Holloway – a ten- year-old Australian girl with light blue hair similar to Mayor McDaniels, blue eyes and was dressed in the South Park Cows cheerleading uniform along with the other girls – pointed at Johnson and Freddie who were busy cleaning out the puke from the back seat.

"I got grounded for two weeks because you threw up all over the back seat!" Pete grumbled at Stan as they watched his Aunt's aides Johnson and Freddie clean out the car. "Aunt Mary barfed on the back seat."

"Sick dude!" He exclaimed with disgust. "You know it was Kyle's fault. He wouldn't shut up about my dad and your Aunt."

"I can hear you." Kyle grumbled with annoyance.

"What are you guys talking about?" Kat asked. Her full name was Katherine Marie Holloway, but Wendy and the girls called her Kat for short. She was also a superhero. When she worked with the Freedom Pals they knew her as Kitty Litter and called her Kitty for short.

"N-nothing." He didn't feel like talking about it. He didn't even like thinking about it. He still hated his dad for everything he did to the town and especially for what he did to Mayor McDaniels.

"Come on Kat!" Fortunately he didn't have to explain it to her as Wendy and Bebe called her over to the group of girls gathered near the back end of the bus. "We can practice our cheers while they clean out the Mayor's car."

"Okay." She ran off to join Wendy and Bebe. They left the girls to practice their cheering.

"Didn't you also take her car without her permission?" Kyle resumed their conversation after Kat was no longer in hearing range.

"So what?" Pete pushed Kyle up against the bus. "She wouldn't have noticed the car if you didn't make him throw up everywhere!"

"What are you kids talking about?" She was behind them with her arms folded and a pissed off expression on her face.

"N-nothing, Aunt Mary." Pete let go of Kyle and he fell on the ground with a thud.

"Ow!" He picked himself up and straightened out his clothes.

An hour later they had aired the puke smell out of the Mayor's SUV and they were on the road again.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

"Why the hell are we even bothering with this?!" She had been complaining about going to Middle Park since they left. She knew people around her were getting tired of her constant complaints, but she didn't care. She felt sick and her stomach still hadn't settled since she threw up all over the back seat.

She dreaded meeting her rival who along with other Middle Park officials would be greeting them outside their hotel when they arrived in town. She loathed their police chief who was morbidly obese, repugnant and sleazy. Whenever she had to be in the same room as him he was drooling over and would often make sexually suggestive comments while staring at her chest. Whenever she refused his advances he'd proceed by calling her frigid or a prude. She felt like a fat whale, her ankles were swollen and sore she could hardly walk. Her baby bump was large and she didn't know how she'd fit into any of the clothes she'd brought with her. Why couldn't Johnson and Freddie cover for her? She'd tried everything to get out of going on this trip, but they insisted she make an appearance.

She lost her train of thought when her husband let one rip. She wanted to puke the moment the putrid smell hit her in the nose.

"Oh for the love of God, George!" She pulled her shirt up to cover her mouth and nose. She tried to calm her little ones who were screaming in the back seat.

Alex pulled over and radioed Johnson and Freddie along with the busses telling them to stop. "That's so bad! The fuck did you eat?!"

"I had the burritos for dinner last night." He didn't see what the big deal was. They were gagging on the smell and he wasn't fazed by it. "It's not that bad."

Pete had his shirt over his nose while trying not to gag. "I can't breathe!"

A wave of nausea overwhelmed her. She had to throw up. "I have to puke!"

"Again?" They asked simultaneously.

"Let me out!" She shouted. She threw open the door and vomited on the side of the road.

Alex opened all the doors and the trunk to air out the smell while Barbrady had gone after her to see if she was okay. "T-that's so fucking bad!" He still held his shirt over his nose.

Some of the children noticed and approached him. "What's going on? Why are we stopping?" Stan Marsh asked curiously.

"Barbrady farted in there." He explained while trying not to breathe in the smell. "It stinks so fucking bad!"

"Why did you have to eat the black beans for dinner before a road trip?!" She yelled at her husband. Even though she hated yelling at her husband, she hated the smell of his farts after he'd eaten Mexican food. Especially if the burritos contained the little black beans. They made him smell putrid.

"You've been farting a lot recently Mary. I'm not the only one." Officer Barbrady's retort amused Eric Cartman who was laughing hysterically.

"I'm pregnant!" She snapped at him. "You have no excuse! You Dutch ovened me last night!"

Kenny McCormick poked his head in the car door to see what all the yelling was about. He started coughing on the fumes and backed away from the Mayor's SUV. "God damn it! You fucking stink Barbrady!"

"It's not that bad!" Barbrady insisted they were over exaggerating.

Stan Marsh pulled his shirt over his nose. "It's worse than Cartman dude!"

"This poor car." Johnson added while shaking his head.

"Can I ride on the bus?" Pete asked without caring that it was densely packed like a can of sardines. They still hadn't managed to air the smell out of his Aunt Mary's SUV. "My eyes fucking burn!"

"You're not allowed to eat Mexican food or the little black beans for the rest of the fucking trip!" She snapped at her husband.

"Eew!" The cheerleaders screamed in disgust as they were walking by and Kat Holloway threw up her lunch.

"Not even my cats smell that bad!" She wretched and ran to a nearby tree to throw up.

"Jee whiz!" Barbrady was still adamant that it wasn't as bad as they were making it out to be. It took them three hours to air the smell out. Not even Barbrady's old dog would go near the car until the smell had lifted.

XXXX

Fortunately the rest of the trip had been uneventful. They were running behind schedule when they finally arrived in Middle Park. Judging by the scowls on the faces that greeted them the Middle Park Mayor and his officials had been waiting a while.

Her nerves were staring to get the better of her. She hadn't seen her Middle Park rival since before the news of her sex scandal with Police Chief Barbrady broke and her embarrassing resignation. Now that she remembered correctly she hadn't seen him since before PC Principal moved to South Park. The Middle Park officials were also not aware that she was now open about her relationship with Chief Barbrady. He didn't believe her when she said over the phone that she was too pregnant to travel and he was unaware that she had her older twins Lena and Olivia and her younger son Jordan. She could tell by the look on his face that he was surprised to see so many new faces among the South Park crew even amongst the students of South Park elementary.

Everyone else was gathered by the school bus just outside the hotel they were to be staying at for the weekend. They were all waiting on her as she hadn't dared to get out of the car.

"Mary?" Barbrady had come to check on her. "Are you okay Hon?"

She sighed and reluctantly held out her hand. She needed help getting out of the car, she felt self conscious when their jaws dropped the minute they saw her. All of a sudden she was aware of how large she was. Looking at them filled her with dread. The last thing she wanted to do was go to a black tie event and make small talk with a bunch of people she didn't even like. She didn't think she'd make it through the night as her stomach churned and gurgled.

"W-who's the father?!" The minute he opened his mouth she wanted to punch him. Rage replaced dread as she clenched her fists and gritted her teeth. Unfortunately she had to bite her tongue and remain professional if she wanted to get to the hotel room quickly.

The Marsh kid was feeling it too. He buried his face in his arm with embarrassment. PC Principal boiled with rage and would at any minute explode and go on a PC war path over his stupid question.

She wrapped her arms around Barbrady's waist. "I see you've already met my husband."

Their jaws dropped. She wished her rival would keep his obnoxious mouth shut. "Y-you're together? Since when?"

She rolled her eyes and didn't answer his question. Her relationship with Barbrady and its duration were none of his business.

She glowered at her rival as he looked over the South Park crew. "That's a scandal. Why were you not recalled?"

She boiled with rage. It wasn't his place to ask. The people of South Park didn't care they were together. They were happy for them to be together. Everyone agreed that things in South Park had been running a lot more smoothly since she and her husband ran the town as a team. "They don't care about that."

Her rival was dumbfounded. He looked at everyone in the South Park crew like they had two heads. "You don't care?!"

She just wanted to get this over with. She wanted to lie down after spending so much time in the car. She needed a shower. She wanted to go to bed. There was plenty of time for him to ask his insulting questions at the stupid black tie dinner they had to attend later that evening.

"South Park works better this way." Linda Stotch explained.

"Where's Garrison?" Her rival asked quickly changing the subject.

 _Can we just check in now so I can go to bed?_ She thought with irritation. She wanted to throw up again. She needed to pee. Why did this have to drag on?

"You're seriously asking that question dude?" Stan Marsh was right on the money with that question. How could he not recognise President Garrison? Even Jimmy Falon mocked them as a city while Garrison was on his campaign trail.

"What?" His ignorance astounded her. She could already tell this trip was going to be hell. "He's not here. Where is he?"

"He's the fucking President of the United States!" even when she wasn't pregnant she had a short fuse especially when it came to stupid people. But, the hormones made her more irritable than normal.

"W-wait a minute?" She didn't know how much more of his stupidity she could take. "President Garrison is your 4th grade teacher?!"

"YES!" The South Park crew shouted simultaneously. They were just as embarrassed by his stupidity as she was.

She didn't understand his ignorance. She thought that as a politician and a voter that he would know it was _that_ Garrison who ran for the Presidency. She made it her mission to know what her rival was doing throughout his campaign and she still insisted on knowing what he got up to in office since everything he did in the White House effected the whole country. She still called Garrison out on his behaviour and his stupidity online. She could no longer access his Twitter as he blocked her from reading his Tweets.

"Who are you?" He asked when he realised his rival and her officials thought he was stupid for not recognising Garrison. He looked at PC Principal as though he were an alien from out of space.

"This should be interesting?" She heard Stan Marsh whispering to Kyle Broflovski.

"PC Principal Bro." PC Principal politely introduced himself and shook her rival's hand. "I'm the new co-principal of South Park elementary."

"Where's Randy Marsh?" He asked when he noticed Randy was also missing from the group.

Randy used to be the coach of the South Park Cows football team, but he was promptly replaced as soon as he was apprehended. Her son took over and did a better job coaching the team. She hoped he would just leave it and not bring it up, but at the same time she expected it. Her stomach sank as she dreaded this conversation. She didn't want to be reminded of that night. She still had nightmares over the attack.

"He's been replaced."Alex explained to her relief. She hoped his response would be enough to appease her rival. "I'm the new coach of the South Park Cows football team."

"What happened to Randy Marsh?"He insisted on them giving him the details. "Why was he replaced? I want to hear this story."

"He went loopy and we locked him up, M'Kay."Mr. Mackey explained.

"Loopy?"The Middle Park Mayor and the football coach of the Middle Park team exchanged glanced. "What did he do?"

"I really want to hear this story."The Middle Park coach added with anticipation.

"Drop the subject!"She shouted at them. They were taken aback by her sudden outburst, but she didn't care. She didn't want to talk about _that_ night and she didn't want other people discussing it in front of her and therefore reminding her of it either.

"What's the matter with you?"Like a lot of people that knew her well enough he was familiar with her temper, but at the same time he liked to antagonise her so she would react.

"I don't want to discuss this! I said, drop the subject!"She snapped at him with hostility.

"Does Randy getting locked up have to do with you?"He smirked at the dumbfounded expression on her face. "It does, doesn't it?"

"DROP IT!"She wanted to hit Mackey. Why couldn't he just leave it alone? Now her Middle Park rival wouldn't shut up about it.

"What happened?"He continued to press for details even though he knew it was the last thing she wanted to talk about.

"I don't want to talk about this."She wished he'd stop. She felt sick to her stomach and it wasn't just the morning sickness.

"Will someone tell me what happened?"Mayor Baxter demanded.

"Randy Marsh kidnapped and tried to rape our Mayor. M'Kay."Mackey explained to everyone's horror. He didn't seem to realise that he probably should've kept his mouth shut.

"Dude!"PC Principal was as horrified as everyone else. "Bro?! What the fuck Mackey?!"

"M'Kay."Mr. Mackey mumbled meekly. He shrank away from her and PC Principal as they glowered at him.

"Wow!"Mayor Baxter was dumbfounded along with everyone else in the Middle Park crew. "I didn't think Randy Marsh had it in him to be a pervert."

"DROP THE SUBJECT!" She screamed in frustration. The flashback she'd had in that moment disturbed her. Randy was on top of her and this time there was no rescue. She felt trapped as not only wouldn't they drop the subject that was making her uncomfortable they wouldn't let her leave. Why wouldn't they just stop?

"He was always an idiot."Mayor Baxter continued ignoring her pleas to stop the discussion. "I didn't think he'd be capable of anything like this? The fuck happened to him?"

"It was the member berries."Clearly Mr. Mackey couldn't help himself. He just couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"The fuck are member berries?!"Mayor Baxter asked with confusion.

"They're little berries that look like grapes. They remind people who eat them and drink wine made from them of the past. They turn people into complete assholes when they get addicted to them."Principal Victoria explained.

She sighed with exasperation and fought back tears as it was clear they weren't going to drop the subject. To make matters worse the Middle Park Police Chief was staring at her chest. She was despondent as she waddled away from the crowd as fast as her swollen ankles could take her. If she had to suffer through the dreaded black tie dinner she at least wanted a nap first.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

She wasn't ready yet. Barbrady and Alex were already in their dress uniforms and she still wore her pyjamas. She hadn't styled her hear or applied any make-up. She didn't want to go to this stupid party. She had tried to get ready earlier, but as soon as she tried to do her hair or her make-up she bolted for the toilet. She felt sick and dreaded being forced to make small talk. She hoped that her rival wouldn't bring Randy Marsh and her attack up again. She'd made it painfully clear to him that she didn't want to discuss the matter.

She sighed as she dug a grey suit out of a suitcase. It was for her nephew Pete and she knew that getting him to put it on and conform for one night for the party would be like pulling teeth.

"No fucking way!"He backed away from her as soon as she approached him with his evening attire.

"You can be a non-conformist for one night!"She sighed with exasperation. It was like this for every formal event they ever had to attend. She would pick out his clothes and he would fight her on it.

"Yuck!"He grimaced with disgust at the sight of the suit she'd picked out for him. "Come on Aunt Mary!"

"We have to get ready _now_!"She shouted with irritation. "We're going to be late!"

Usually she didn't care that her nephew chose the non-conformist life style. His friends were good kids and she didn't mind having them over. This was one of the few times when his life style choice started to rub her the wrong way. There was always an argument before she got him to comply.

"I don't want to go to this stupid party Aunt Mary!"Pete protested. She'd backed him into a corner as she tried to give him the suit.

"You're just going to have to suck it up!"She snapped without disguising her irritation. "I don't want to go either, but we have to make an appearance!"

Pete begrudgingly took the ugly suit from her and went to get changed. He mumbled under his breath as he went to his room. "Conformist bitch."

"I heard that!"She couldn't be bothered arguing with him after he flipped her off. She sighed as she too had to get ready for this stupid party. Somehow she didn't think any of the formal dresses she'd brought with her would fit over her baby bump.

XXXX

"Where's Mary?"He wondered as they were all ready and waiting for her.

"She made a big deal about me not getting dressed and she's not even ready yet!"" Pete exclaimed with annoyance.

He ignored his nephew's complaining and went to find her. They were already late to the party. When he found her she was sitting on the floor of the walk in closet. She wasn't dressed and she was nowhere near ready to go. She sat in her underwear with an open suitcase at her feet as she clutched two formal dresses. She sobbed heavily and make-up stained her face. She was a nervous wreck.

"Oh Mary." He wished he didn't have to drag her along to this party. He'd tried to get them out of it, but the Middle Park officials were having none of it.

"I'm a big fat whale!"She cried while still clutching evening gowns that were two sizes too small. "None of my clothes fit and I can't wear my dress shoes!" She showed him her swollen ankles.

He had a feeling it would come to this so he came prepared. He knew she wouldn't like it, but they were expected at the black tie dinner. He handed her two boxes. He'd bought her a maternity evening gown and shoes that he hoped would fit her feet. "I'm sorry Mary, I know you don't want to go, but we have to."

"Why?"She looked at him with desperation. It was painfully obvious that she didn't want anything to do with Middle Park or her political rival. "George, you hate these unity events."

"I know and I don't like dealing with Middle Park, but we're the first family of South Park and we have to." He felt guilty for dragging her along.

XXXX

"What's the point of this again?" The boys were dressed in formal wear and had arrived at the black tie party along with the cheerleaders and school faculty. Their parents were already drunk on expensive Champaign. As far as he was concerned this party was just an excuse for Middle Park to flex some muscle and show them they were a better more cultured and progressive city. He sighed with exasperation as South Park had jumped on the progressive band wagon before and it ruined the town. It turned his dad into a monster. Fortunately Randy was safely locked away so he couldn't hurt the Mayor or anyone else.

Craig read his mind. "They just want to show off because they think they're better than us."

Cartman laughed hysterically. He wondered what Fat Ass found so funny until he saw Pete in his formal wear. He knew right away that his Aunt had picked out his clothes. Even though his suit was grey, it wasn't something the non conformist would pick out for himself.

"What are you supposed to be?" Cartman asked between fits of laughter.

Pete hit Cartman in the arm which knocked him on the ground. "Shut up Fat Ass!"

Cartman stopped laughing as soon as the Mayor's nephew knocked him on his ass. Cartman rubbed his arm and started crying. They all knew Eric Cartman was all talk whenever he challenged someone to fight. One slight punch would knock him down and have him bawling. Even his girlfriend Wendy beat his ass and if Cartman didn't watch himself the new girl Katherine Holloway would certainly tare him a new asshole.

"Whoa dude!" he exclaimed a little too loudly when he saw Pete's Aunt Mary with Police Chief Barbrady. The dress she wore – despite it being a well fitted maternity gown – really accentuated her growing baby bump.

"Shh!" Pete urged him to shut up. "She's really fucking sensitive about her weight gain!"

"Oh great!" Kyle sighed with exasperation as kids from their rival team approached. "It's that kid."

Every time he saw Simon Baxter he wanted to hit him. He was the quarterback of the Middle Park football team and the Mayor of Middle Park's son. He was shorter than he was, had sandy blond hair and blue eyes. He was a miniature copy of his father. Every time they had to go to Middle Park for a game or the Middle Park team had to come to South Park he hit on his girlfriend Wendy. Wendy had made it clear multiple times that she wasn't interested in Simon. If he made another pass at his girlfriend he couldn't be held responsible for his actions. Wendy approached with the other cheerleaders; they all wore formal party dresses. Wendy wore a red strapless gown, Bebe dressed in a pale blue gown with spaghetti straps and Kat wore a dark green dress. As he suspected Wendy wasn't comfortable in Simon's presence.

"If it isn't the quarterback of the South Park Cows." His arrogance annoyed him. He could tell he was looking at the girls. He wanted to hit Simon. His anger peaked when Simon smirked. "Hello Wendy." He didn't recognise Kat as she'd only just moved to town. "Who's the new cheerleader?"

"This is Katherine." Wendy reluctantly introduced them. "She's our new cheerleader. We think she'll help us win Nationals."

The girls were competing in cheer competitions and Wendy really wanted to make it to Nationals. He didn't hear the end of it when they held auditions for the squad and recruited Katherine to the team.

"I'm Simon Baxter." He noticed that he'd started flirting with Katherine and didn't even attempt to make a move on Wendy. "I'm the quarterback of the Middle Park team."

"This should be interesting." Kyle whispered to Kenny who giggled with amusement. He wasn't the only one who could sense this ending badly for Simon. Katherine didn't take crap from people. She beat up the sixth graders and they were too afraid of her to make fun of her again.

"I wouldn't try that if I were you." He didn't know why he was warning Simon about the possibility of Kat hitting him for being a creep. If anything he deserved a punch in the face.

They weren't expecting it. He didn't think Katherine saw it coming. Simon kissed her on the lips. It happened so quickly she didn't get the chance to avoid the kiss. She grimaced with disgust as she pushed him away.

"Get your slimy mitts off me!" She screamed as she punched him in the face and knocked him on the ground.

"Eew!" The other girls screamed with repulsion.

The South Park football team laughed hysterically. Simon Baxter deserved it. He knew as soon as he tried flirting with Kat that she'd hit him. Both the Mayor of Middle Park and the Mayor of South Park had seen the incident. Everyone knew the fight wasn't over yet. Kat wanted him to pay and without a doubt Simon would need a hospital when she was done.

"I just thought if you don't have a boyfriend then you may as well go out with someone who isn't a total loser." Simon didn't seem to think what he did was wrong.

Kat punched him again and knocked him on the ground. She was angry and ready to fight. It would be an easy victory and if she did beat his ass he would never let him live this down. "Dude, just back off. She beat up the sixth graders."

Before the fight could escalate the Mayor of Middle Park dragged his son away from Katherine who was pummelling him. Fighting Simon wasn't much of a challenge for her.

The Middle Park Mayor checked his boy over. Simon had a black eye and a scuffed knee, his tuxedo was torn and his arms were bruised. "Control your brats Mary!" He snapped at McDaniels who had a tight grip on Kat. It was just as well McDaniels held her back because Katherine was still looking for a fight.

"What's going on here?" PC Principal intercepted the argument before it began.

"That little brat hit my kid!" Mayor Baxter shouted angrily while pointing at Kat.

"That kid tried to kiss me!" Kat screamed to PC Principal's horror.

PC Principal's face turned bright red and he trembled with rage. "Did you get consent from Katherine before you did that?"

"N-no." Simon mumbled meekly. He wasn't used to PC Principal who was still fairly new to South Park.

"You didn't get clear consent from Katherine so she had a right to hit you." PC Principal would go on a war path at any moment.

"S-she doesn't get detention?" Simon asked horrified.

"No. This doesn't warrant detention." Kat smirked as PC Principal gave her permission to hit him again.

Katherine lunged at Simon Baxter and knocked him to the floor. They were on the ground exchanging blows. Kat didn't seem to care that he'd damaged her dress and she hit him when he pulled her hair. "Is that all you got?"

"Fuck him up Kitty!" Butters urged her on. The fight ended as soon as PC Principal determined that Simon Baxter had had enough.

Kat was satisfied. "That's the first time I've been able to beat the crap out of someone without getting detention." She smirked and flipped Simon off.

"What the fuck Mary?!" Mayor Baxter shouted at her incredulously. "You're just going to stand there and let this shit happen?!"

"There's nothing I can do about Peter when he's on a PC war path." She shrugged. She tried to suppress laughter and remain professional in this situation, but it was hard. She wanted to laugh with the children who were all amused by the situation.

"I demand an apology for this!" Mayor Baxter shouted. "That little brat needs to be punished!"

XXXX

He grabbed her by the arm as she was attempting to leave. She'd had enough of this stupid party and wanted to go back to the hotel. She didn't even want to be in Middle Park and wished again that she was able to get out of coming. There was no reason why Johnson and Freddie couldn't cover for her. At least she wouldn't have to contend with their police chief staring at her chest.

"What the fuck?!" He startled her. She wasn't expecting it. She cringed as their morbidly obese, balding Police Chief stood behind her feeling her ass. She cringed and she wanted to hit him.

"You're looking lovely this evening Mary." She didn't know who she found more repugnant. Randy Marsh or this moron. They both made her skin crawl.

"What the fuck bro?!" PC Principal grabbed him by the scruff of his uniform – which was two sized too small for his heavy frame – and dragged him away from her. "I just lectured your Mayor's kid about getting consent before kissing a girl. That's not fucking PC brah!"

This was one of the few times where she was glad they still had the PC frat house in town. She knew PC Principal wouldn't stand for this crap.

"Did she say you could touch her?!" He maintained his grip on their police chief and shook him as he demanded an answer.

"No." She wanted PC Principal to deal with him so she didn't have to. "I didn't say he could touch me."

"What's going on?" Barbrady approached them when he noticed the fighting.

"That pervert grabbed my ass!" She snapped and pointed at the Chief of Middle Park Police.

Her husband's face turned bright red with rage. "Keep your hands off my wife!"

Moments later PC Principal along with Chief Barbrady dragged the Chief of Middle Park Police outside to deal with him.

"What the fuck Mary?!" Mayor Baxter clamoured clearly taken aback.

"What?" She shrugged. She just wanted the evening to end. "That's just Peter."

"What are you going to do about this?" He demanded angrily. "Are you going to apologise at least?"

Instead of apologising like he wanted morning sickness reared its ugly head. She ejected the contents of her stomach all over him.

"Oh God!" Embarrassment overwhelmed her as he backed away from her with disgust.

"What the fuck Mary!" He clamoured with repulsion coupled with embarrassment as Chief Barbrady and PC Principal returned and started laughing at him as he was covered in puke.

"It's not funny George!" She snapped at him. "Take me back to the hotel now!"

Without hesitation Barbrady gather up his family and escorted them back to their hotel. The school children and chaperoning parents roared with hysterical laughter as they were leaving.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

"I'm so fucking embarrassed." It's not the first time she'd thrown up on people while pregnant. When she was pregnant with her first set of twins Lena and Olivia she threw up all over Randy Marsh. Even though both Marsh and Mayor Baxter deserved it. It didn't make her any less embarrassed. To make matters worse everyone saw and most if not all of the people in the room were constituents.

She didn't think she'd ever live this down. Especially not since the little fat kid filmed the incident on his phone and knowing Eric Cartman he would have posted the video to any social media accounts he had.

As soon as they returned to the safety of the hotel she ran to the bathroom. She was so sick she couldn't keep anything down.

"We should've left Aunt Mary at home." Pete said with concern when they heard her wretch.

"I tried to get us out of this." Barbrady explained. "But they wouldn't listen. Mary isn't well enough to travel."

"They didn't believe Barbrady when he told them she was pregnant and too sick to travel."Alex explained.

"She's supposed to be on maternity leave."Barbrady went to check on her as she'd stopped throwing up and hadn't left the bathroom. When he found her she was coiled in a tight ball around the toilet. "Oh. Mary."

"I just want to go home!"She wailed. "I'm a big fat whale!"

"You're not fat Mary."He scooped her up from the floor and held her in his arms as she started sobbing. "You're carrying new life."

She leaned over the toilet to throw up again. "I'm still fat."

"You're not fat. You're beautiful to me Mary."He held her face in his hands and wiped away the tears that were streaming down her face.

"You still find me attractive?"She asked incredulously.

He kissed her on the forehead. "Do you want me to run you a bath?

She hugged him tightly. Even without putting his hands on her baby bump he could feel the twins kicking. "Okay."

He ran her a bubble bath and treated her to some of the expensive chocolates from the mini bar before making her comfortable.

XXXX

"Make it stop!"She was lying in bed trying to get rid of a migraine when someone banged their fists on their hotel room door.

Barbrady went to see who was there and what could possibly be so urgent. He wasn't happy when he answered it to find Mayor Baxter standing before him with his arms folded and a pissed off look on his face. "What do you want?"

"You know damn well what I want!"He snapped with hostility. "I demand an apology for a start. I want an apology from your wife and I want that little brat to apologise to my son. I also wanted to talk to Mary about making a wager for tomorrow's big game considering you're going to lose."

"Mary doesn't want to see anyone least of all you. She's sick."Barbrady tried to slam the door in Baxter's face, but he barged his way in.

"Sick? That's the lamest excuse I've ever heard. I'm not leaving until I talk to Mary!"He sat down at the dining room table and strummed his fingers on the surface of the table.

"Peter?" Barbrady called his nephew over. "Would you fetch your Aunt Mary for me?" Pete reluctantly did as he was told and returned with a sickly pale McDaniels.

"What do you want?!" She was less than impressed to see him in their apartment. They could tell she wanted him gone.

"God damn! Mary, you look like crap." He exclaimed when he finally saw her.

"Why did you come here for? I mean other than to insult me!" She scowled at Mayor Baxter as she waited for an answer.

"I demand an apology!" Baxter insisted. "You threw up all over me, it's the least you can do."

"I don't owe you shit!" She snarled. He and Alex backed away from her as her fists curled and her brow twitched with rage. "You deserved it."

"Get out of here poser!" Pete shouted with frustration. No one in the First Family of South Park had any respect for the Mayor of Middle Park.

"I'm not leaving here until you can guarantee me three things Mary." Baxter insisted as he continued to click the pen and strum the table with his fingers. "First: I want you to apologise for that embarrassing display at the black tie dinner, second: I want that little brat punished for what she did to my son and third: I want to make a bet regarding tomorrow's big game."

"I'm not apologising because you're an insensitive jackass and you deserved it, that girl won't be punished because your kid should've thought of that before he tried to stick his tongue down her throat and I'm not making any bet with you because you'll only weasel out of it if you lose." She said without disguising her irritation. He wondered how long it would be before she snatched the pen from his hand and broke all his fingers. "Get out!"

"Hmm." He pondered for a moment. "No. Not until you apologise and you have to mean it."

"Get out!" She snarled as her face turned bright red with rage.

"I don't hear an apology." He smirked smugly. "Not to mention the fact that you still owe Middle Park elementary for the team mascot Jimbo Kern blew up."

"If you don't stop clicking that fucking pen I'll shove it up your ass!" Pete shouted with frustration. "Fucking poser!"

"You need to control your brats Mary. They don't have manners." Baxter snapped at her clearly insulted by Pete's sudden outburst.

She wanted to break his neck. She couldn't take it anymore. She was trying to get rid of a migraine when Pete dragged her out of bed at his insistence. "I said, get out!"

"I'll stop when you apologise." He clicked the pen a couple more times to irritate her further. He smirked when her brow twitched and she growled through gritted teeth.

Defeated she sighed with exasperation. "I'm sorry."

He clicked his pen a few more times and tapped the tabletop. "I don't think that was sincere Mary. Sounds to me like you didn't mean it."

She wanted to puke and it wasn't just the morning sickness that unsettled her stomach. "What do you want me to say?"

His smirk became wider as he clicked his pen. "I want you to say – sincerely I might add – "I'm sorry Mayor Baxter for being a bitch."

"What the fuck?!" Alex was horrified, Barbrady's jaw dropped to the floor and Pete's face turned pale.

She was taken aback. She wished she'd bit her tongue. "Wait... I – I..."

"Say it!" He demanded vehemently.

She slumped. There was no way out of it. It was the only way to get rid of him. She choked on her words as she spoke bitterly. "I'm sorry Mayor Baxter for being a bitch."

"Mom? What the fuck?" Alex shouted aghast that she'd given into Baxter's demands.

He clicked his pen again when he realised he had her trapped. "And the girl? That brat hit my son remember? She has to be punished."

McDaniels sighed heavily. "I'll talk to PC Principal. She'll probably get detention."

Mayor Baxter leaned back in his chair and stretched. A satisfied smirk broadened across his face. "How about that wager?"

"What makes you think your team is going to win?"Alex interjected without getting up. He sat on the couch with his nose in a book.

"My kid is quarterback. That's how I know."He snapped at Alex before returning his focus to McDaniels. "Well Mary? How about it? Unless you're scared of losing?"

"Fine." He wasn't going to leave otherwise. She just wanted to go back to bed. "I'll take the bet. What did you have in mind?"

"Two things." His smirk became wider when he noticed she was nervous. Her jaw dropped when he text messaged his police chief and let him into their apartment. "First: You have to go on a date with Carl here and second: Fear Factor."

"I don't want that thing near my wife!" Barbrady snapped as his face turned bright red with rage.

"What's the matter Barbrady? Worried your team might actually lose?" He laughed at the fear etched on her face.

"What's the fear factor part of this wager?" Alex asked out of curiosity.

"Little birdies told me that you're petrified of snakes Mary." Baxter and Carl laughed as her jaw dropped. "I heard you locked your office building down for two weeks over a fucking snake in your office."

"You son of a bitch!" Her face turned pale. She didn't want to agree to any of this. As much as she hated them she'd prefer the snakes over going on a date with their police chief.

"I'm not the one who locked my office down because of snake in my office." He shrugged.

"What about you?" She called him out on his bullshit. "I heard you scream like a little girl whenever you see a spider."

He stopped in his tracks. He wasn't expecting to get called out. "I... ah... That's not true."

"What's the matter Baxter?" She smirked as he became transparent. She could see right through him. "Worried your team might lose?"

"Fine." He snapped at her. "I'll see you holding a python after the game in front of everyone. You have to hold it for at least five minutes."

"And I'll take you on a date right after you hold the snake." Chief Carl smirked.

"Fine!" She dreaded the thought of losing, but she wasn't going to let him beat her. "I'll see you holding a tarantula in front of everyone. You have to hold it for at least five minutes."

"And..." Alex interjected. "Since, if in the event we lose and mom also has to go on a date with this loser you have to run two laps of the hotel complex."

Baxter shrugged like it was nothing. "I can do that."

They noticed Baxter didn't like the smirk that broadened across Alex McDaniels' face. "You have to run the two laps... naked. In front of everyone."

Baxter trembled with rage. "Fine. It's a deal. I'll see you losing tomorrow Mary. I look forward to seeing you with your new slithery friend."

"I'll pick you up at eight o'clock." Carl smirked before leaving.

"Don't get your hopes up asshole." McDaniels pushed them out the door. "You'll lose tomorrow, I know it." She slammed the door in their faces. She looked at her son with desperation. "Those brats have to win the game tomorrow. I'm not holding a fucking python and I'm _not_ going on a date with that jackass. He's repugnant!"

"All bets aside I'm confident The Cows will win the big game against Middle Park." Alex assured her as she'd already started to panic.

"See that they do." She cringed at the thought of losing. She didn't know which was worse, the snakes or Chief Carl? Either way they both made her skin crawl.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

The children gathered around Officer McDaniels after they finished a last minute training session.

"Are you okay dude?" Stan asked Officer McDaniels as he wasn't the only one who noticed that he looked nervous.

"The stakes in this game are a lot higher now. We have to win. No slacking off." He explained. "Mom's putting pressure on you kids to win."

"How come?" Katherine Holloway asked. The cheerleaders used the last minute session as an excuse to practice their routine for nationals.

"We'll win." Stan assured him. "We have Dovahkiin on the team now."

"There's no doubt that you kids stand a good chance to win against Middle Park tomorrow." Despite his comments McDaniels still seemed extremely nervous.

"But?" He wasn't the only one who noticed his hesitation.

Officer McDaniels sighed. "Mom has a bet with the Mayor of Middle Park. If we lose she has to hold a giant python in front of everyone."

Stan and Katherine Holloway were horrified. "Dude, your mom hates snakes."

"That's not the worst of it." Officer McDaniels said with concern. "She also has to go on a date with their police chief and we all know she hates his guts."

"What happens if Middle Park loses?" Kat asked curiously.

"It's a fear factor bet. If we lose mom has to hold the snake. If they lose he has to hold a tarantula because word is he screams like a girl over spiders no matter how big they are." Alex explained.

"Your mom has to go on a date with that gross loser police chief. What does the Middle Park Mayor have to do?" Wendy asked since there were two parts to the wager.

"He has to run two laps of this hotel complex butt naked." Officer McDaniels explained to their amusement.

Katherine grimaced with disgust. "Why would anyone agree to hold spiders and snake? Eew!"

"Pride and bragging rights kid." Officer McDaniels explained. "These bets are also designed to humiliate the loser. Mayor Baxter wants to see my mother publically humiliated." Katherine ran off and the girls went after her.

"She's weird." Cartman said after she left.

"Don't say that to her face Fat Ass. She beat up the sixth graders remember?" Kyle warned him.

"You know our fear Stan." Officer McDaniels interjected. "We have to win this game."

"I remember the giant fucking python in your mom's office dude." He still hadn't forgotten the big snake as it wrapped around the window behind the Mayor's desk or the amount of police it took to get the snake out of the building that day.

"You're afraid of snakes dude?" Cartman asked McDaniels incredulously.

"I don't like snakes at all." Officer McDaniels grimaced with disgust.

Cartman started laughing hysterically without realising Officer McDaniels' face had turned bright red with rage. "But, you're a dude!"

"Everyone's afraid of something Eric." Officer McDaniels said in his own defence. If any of the students could benefit from a couple weeks detention it was Eric Cartman and not Katherine Holloway.

"You're a cop!" The fat kid wasn't going to let this go. He never let him live it down when he found out he was afraid of snakes. Cartman would mock Officer McDaniels for it for the rest of his life.

"Fifty laps Eric." Officer McDaniels snapped when he'd had enough of Eric's taunts.

"Serves you right Fat Ass." Stan yelled at Cartman. He wasn't the only one getting sick of Cartman's bullshit. Even hanging around Cartman and playing games according to his rules was becoming a chore.

"Fuck you Stan!" Cartman shouted back.

"Fifty laps Eric." Officer McDaniels shooed him away. Cartman reluctantly started running the field.

"This is bull crap!" He shouted at McDaniels.

"You see now why we need to win tomorrow." Officer McDaniels insisted.

"Your mom won't be holding a snake or going on a date with a fat moron." Dovahkiin assured him. "We'll win."

XXXX

After Officer McDaniels drove them back to the hotel and they called it a night there was a knock at their hotel room door. The kids were all still awake and wondered who was knocking if Cartman hadn't ordered room service.

"Aw!"Stan grumbled when he opened the door. It was Simon Baxter and his friends. "What the hell do you want?"

"I just want to talk to you guys real quick."Simon seamed unusually nervous and he didn't think it was because Katherine Holloway was glaring at him.

"What are you doing?"Kat snapped at Simon with irritation.

"I'm sorry about this kiss at the party okay."Simon mumbled nervously. "I just thought you were pretty."

"Do it again and you won't be."She aimed a clenched fist at his face.

Simon shrank away from her. "I actually came here to talk to Stan about my dad and the bet he's got with your Mayor."

"What about him?"Stan asked out of curiosity. Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Dovahkiin, Butters, Clyde and Token had gathered around Stan. They wanted to hear this as well.

"Can we come in for a bit? It's important."Simon and his friends were standing in the doorway.

"Okay."Stan let him in and the kids sat down to talk. "What's this about?"

"You guys know about my dad's bet with your Mayor?"Simon began.

"Officer McDaniels just told us not to lose because of that."Dovahkiin said to Simon's surprise.

"My dad has to lose the bet."Simon insisted.

Their jaws dropped. "Wait? What?"

"My dad's a dick."Simon explained with resentment. "We don't want to win this game. My friends want to play video games and I want to go to camp so I can get away from him for a couple of weeks."

"Y-you want to throw the game?"Stan asked incredulously. He thought Simon would want to win. Middle Park usually liked to gloat. This is the first time in the history of the Middle Park/South Park feud that someone on either side wanted to throw a rivalry game. It was unheard of.

"We want to throw the game."Simon assured them it wasn't a joke and explained how unbearable his father had been to live with leading up to the rivalry game. "My dad is petrified of spiders. This morning at breakfast a spider ran across the dining table and he screamed like a woman. Spider was this big."Simon showed them how tiny the spider was.

"Your dad's a little wuss!"Cartman laughed hysterically.

"Tell your offense not to block us and we'll tackle you."Stan ignored Cartman. Throwing the game worked in their favour because at least they wouldn't lose and they wouldn't get in trouble from the Mayor. "Don't make the loss look too obvious. Make it look like we're losing at first so your dad doesn't know."

"Dude!"Kyle pulled Stan aside. "We can't throw the game! We can win on our own."

"Do you want to lose and get in trouble from the Mayor?"Stan pushed him away.

"N-no."Kyle mumbled meekly.

"We'll help you as long as you don't mention this to our coach or our Mayor."Stan held out his to seal the agreement. "And you're not allowed to hit on Wendy or the other cheerleaders again."

Simon agreed to Stan's conditions. "See you at the game South Parker's."

"That kid is such a dick."Kat grumbled after he left.

"It's Middle Park dude."Stan explained. "What do you expect?"

Katherine flipped him off as the girls went to bed.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

She was nervous. Her stomach gurgled as she'd spent the night curled around the toilet. She shuddered at the thought of losing and wished she didn't have to attend the game. She didn't want to hold a python and she certainly didn't want to go on a date with Chief Carl Wright. She was throwing up when Barbrady came in to see what she wanted for breakfast. She was green in the face and didn't want to eat anything.

"What about peppermint tea?" He asked as helped her to the couch in the living room.

"Okay."It was all she could stomach. She was so sick she couldn't keep anything down. She sat on the couch with a bucket between her knees.

"Those little bastards have to win the game!"She snapped at Alex who handed her a glass of iced water. "I'm not holding a snake and I'm not going on a date with that jackass!"

"The team have trained hard."Alex assured her. "Mayor Baxter will be screaming over a tarantula I promise."

"He fucking better!"Irritability peaked as thoughts of losing swirled in her head.

"Not to worry mom."He assured her with confidence. "You won't be holding a snake or going on a date with that moron."

She still wasn't convinced as she dashed to the bathroom to throw up after filling the bucket.

XXXX

The next morning the kids hoped that Simon Baxter wouldn't back track on their agreement to throw the big game.

"He better not be a buttfucking traitor!" Cartman wasn't the only one who didn't trust Baxter despite the agreement.

"We'll just let Kat kick his ass if he goes back on the deal."The other kids liked this suggestion. Stan shushed everyone when Officer McDaniels approached them for his motivational pep talk.

"You kids know how important it is that we win this game."Officer McDaniels began as his pregnant mother appeared beside him. "Give it all you've got and no slacking off."

"You brats have to win!"McDaniels snapped. "I'm not holding a snake today!"

"You won't have to."Stan was positive Simon Baxter wouldn't go back on his part of their deal. He seemed adamant that he didn't want to put up with his father if Middle Park won the game. He said nothing about this to the Mayor or his coach. They would pretend to lose until half time so neither Mayor McDaniels or Mayor Baxter suspected they were intentionally throwing the game.

"I better not!"McDaniels was on edge. She didn't hide her nervousness. "You all know I fucking hate snakes!"She grimaced with disgust when she noticed Chief Wright making kissing faces at her from the grandstand. "Please?! I don't want to go on a date with that jackass either!"

"It's okay Mayor."He tried to assure her. He wanted to tell her that Mayor Baxter's kid wanted to throw the game and there was nothing to worry about, but he bit his tongue. Simon didn't want his dad to know that he intended to lose the game out of spite. "We'll win for sure."

"What's going on?"Officer McDaniels returned after helping his mother to her position in the grandstand. "You seem overly confident we'll win Stan."

"N-nothing."He mumbled meekly as he met Officer McDaniels' gaze.

Fortunately Simon was able to throw suspicion. "You're going down South Park!"

"Oh yeah!"He pretended to heckle Simon as Officer McDaniels kept a close eye on him. "You're going to lose and your dad will hold a spider!"

Katherine Holloway flipped Simon off as she and the girls took their positions on the field.

"What's her problem?"Simon shrugged.

"I told you not to try anything with her." He had warned Simon and because he didn't listen Simon wore a swollen black eye as a result.

"Alright kids let's move!"Officer McDaniels ushered them towards the field where they took their starting positions.

XXXX

"You're going down McDaniels!"Mayor Baxter of Middle Park had been heckling her since she took her seat in the grandstand. "With my kid on the team we can't lose."

The game had already started and Middle Park scored the first touchdown. She scowled at her rival as he smirked with satisfaction. "The game has just started jackass!"She snapped at him. "You can still lose!"

As the game progressed Middle Park remained ahead of South Park on the scoreboard. Halftime was approaching fast and as Middle Park's score increased the more nervous she became.

"Looks like you're losing McDaniels."Baxter sniggered. He could tell she was incredibly nervous. "I've contacted the zoo. They're keepers are bringing in a nice big python for you to hold."

"I've made reservations for 8:30pm."Chief Wright smirked. He was staring at her chest as he spoke. "I'll pick you up at 8pm."

"Oh God!"Her face paled and beads of sweat ran down her face. She felt sick and it wasn't just the morning sickness. She got up and shouted at the children over the railing. "Come on! You little bastards! You're killing me!"

XXXX

Stan approached Simon during half time while the cheerleaders were showing off their routines. "They don't think you're losing. Now you have to tell your offence not to block us so we can tackle you. They don't suspect you're throwing the game."

"Yeah."Simon giggled. "My dad has no fucking clue. I'll actually be able to go to camp."

Stan laughed. He couldn't wait to see the Mayor of Middle Park screaming over a tarantula. He also knew that this truce with Middle Park was temporary. As soon as the game was over they were enemies again. He didn't mind so much because even when he was being somewhat nice to him there was still nothing he liked about Simon Baxter.

"Dad's got a massive snake for you."Simon smirked like his father when Mayor McDaniels arrived with their coach.

"Don't remind me kid."She snapped at Simon who flipped her off as he left with his friends. McDaniels rolled her eyes. "Obnoxious brat!"

"What's with the losing streak?!"Officer McDaniels asked clearly surprised by this development. "You said you'd win!"

Mayor McDaniels panicked beside him. "What the hell kid?! You said I wouldn't be holding a snake. You're killing me!"

"The game's not over yet."He reminded them. "We'll try harder in the second half."

"What the hell Stan?!"Officer McDaniels was surprised by him. "It's not like you to play a lazy game."

"I'm sorry."He mumbled meekly. He wished he could tell them why he was doing this. Keeping his mouth shut as he agreed was proving harder than he thought especially since Mayor McDaniels panicked at the thought of losing.

"Just don't lose the second half kid!" McDaniels snapped.

"We'll do better. I promise."After they left he went to find Simon Baxter. "You guys have to start losing right now or my team is in big trouble!"

"Why will you get in trouble for losing?"Simon asked curiously.

"Our Mayor is pissed at us because of the first half. Have you seen her mad? We don't want to get in trouble!"He shook Baxter to make him realise it was imperative for them to win.

"You know how you pissed Katherine off?" Kyle asked Simon who nodded nervously. "She's a mini Mayor McDaniels especially when pissed off dude! You _have_ to throw the game now!"

"Okay, okay."Simon tried to calm them as they panicked over the possibility of getting into trouble. "We'll start losing."

Stan and Simon pretended to heckle each other over the game when he noticed Mayor Baxter approaching them. Flanking him were the Middle Park coach and their elementary school Principal. "Come on kids we have a game to win."Their coach started to usher them onto the field.

Mayor Baxter smirked as he congratulated his team on their progress. "Watching that whore screaming over a snake will be the highlight of my day after the big win."

"The game's not over yet."Stan reminded him. "You could still be screaming over a spider dude."

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. "You lost South Park. Deal with it."

"What a dick?"He sighed with exasperation after Mayor Baxter and his goons left.

"See, I told you."Simon said matter-of-factly. "This is why I would rather go to camp."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

"You're going down slut!"Mayor Baxter resumed heckling her as soon as she sat down after half time.

So far South Park was still losing and McDaniels felt angrily insulted. "The fuck did you just call me?!"

"You're a slut Mary!"He taunted her and all of it was unnecessary.

"Call my wife a slut again and I'll kick your ass!"Barbrady snapped at Mayor Baxter.

Mayor Baxter laughed derisively. "Yeah right. I'd like to see you try."

"Leave my wife alone!"Barbrady snapped in her defence. To make the situation worse Chief Wright was staring at her chest. She felt self conscious and was aware of how large she'd become in pregnancy. She covered herself with a blanket Barbrady had given her.

"Your wife's a publicity whore Barbrady."Mayor Baxter redirected his attention to Barbrady, but continued to insult her. "You can tell when ever you turn on the TV and she's making kissy faces at the cameras. Wouldn't surprise me if you slept with them to get your fifteen minutes Mary."

"What the fuck?!"She didn't need this shit. She just wished he'd sit down and shut up. She didn't even want to be there in the first place.

"She's a nice piece of ass too."Chief Wright smirked at her. She shrank back into Barbrady when she noticed the hungry look in his eyes. "I'm looking forward to our date Mary."

She wished she could disappear. She still wasn't confident her team could win even though they'd started to pick up the slack. She wasn't even amused when Eric Cartman kicked the football at a Middle Park kid's face. She dreaded losing the bet. She leaned into her husband and sighed with exasperation. "I'm not a slut."

Mayor Baxter and Middle Park officials laughed in her face. "Didn't you pay Chef for sex once?"

"Woo! Woo! Woo! What the hell is going on here?!"PC Principal intercepted the fighting.

"These two assholes sexually harassed my wife!"Barbrady's face had turned bright red with rage.

"They called me a slut."She explained to PC Principal who was trembling with rage and on the verge of a PC warpath. She was glad to have him there. She knew he wouldn't stand for it. She was confident that Peter and Barbrady would put her rival in his place.

"You _are_ a whore Mary!" He laughed derisively. "You know you'd accomplish more if you just kept your legs shut!"

"I-I'm not a slut." She hid her face in Barbrady's broad shoulder and struggled not to cry.

"Please!" Mayor Baxter snorted and rolled his eyes. "As if I don't know you sleep around. You've been with Barbrady – which you should've been recalled for – Chef, Liane Cartman, I heard you sucked Garrison's dick and Randy Marsh had the hots for you."

Chief Wright and other Middle Park officials seated nearby were laughing at her. She didn't want to be reminded of President Garrison's victory lap or Randy's attack on her. She still had nightmares from that night. The Middle Park councillors continued to laugh at her as her rival and police chief mocked her. Unable to control her emotions she sobbed into her husband's shoulder. "Stop!"

"Woo! Woo! Woo!" PC Principal trembled with rage. It wouldn't take long before he exploded and took it out on the Middle Park officials laughing at her. "You can't talk down to women like that brah! It's not PC brah!"

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kick your ass!" Barbrady shouted at Baxter.

"Your wife's a slut Barbrady!" Baxter snapped at him. "How do you know she isn't spreading her legs behind your back?!"

As much as she wanted to she couldn't will the tears to stop. Embarrassment overwhelmed her as Middle Park officials mocked her for crying. "I'm not a slut." She mumbled meekly without looking at them.

"What the fuck bro?!" PC Principal grabbed Mayor Baxter by the collar of his shirt and hit him in the face. "I told you to shut the fuck up brah! You can't talk down to women like that brah!"

Mayor Baxter rolled his eyes. "Not this PC bullshit! She is a slut! It's fact!"

PC Principal punched Mayor Baxter in the face again. As his fist collided with Baxter's jaw he knocked out his two front teeth. He didn't seem fazed that he'd skinned his knuckles in the process. PC Principal even gave him the opportunity to stop being a jackass before hitting him again.

"She is a whore!" Mayor Baxter wouldn't stop. Especially not since South Park and Middle Park were neck and neck on the scoreboard. One more touchdown and the Cows would tie with the Middle Park team.

"I'm going to break your fucking legs brah!" PC Principal shouted enraged. By the time he was finished with him Mayor Baxter's eyes were swollen shut.

"Son of a bitch!" Baxter clutched his bloody nose. "You broke my face! I'll sue you for that!"

"Go ahead brah!" PC Principal wasn't fazed by Mayor Baxter's threats to take him to court. "That's not fucking PC brah!"

XXXX

The kids stopped in their tracks when they noticed PC Principal fighting Mayor Baxter in the grandstands.

"What's the deal with that guy?" Simon asked without caring that PC Principal was punching his father's face in.

Stan realised the Middle Park team weren't familiar with PC Principal. They only knew Principal Victoria who was now Vice Principal of their school. This would have been the first time that Simon and his teammates had seen PC Principal on a warpath which was something they were all used to.

"That's PC Principal dude." Kyle explained. "He's like that all the time. I got detention for saying Cartman eats like a pig."

Simon's face paled in shock. "That guy is your principal?!"

"Co Principal." Wendy explained as the girls had joined them to watch the fight in the grandstand. "The school board gave Principal Victoria her job back after Mr. Mackey got her fired."

"Didn't think old Mackey had it in him to be an asshole." Simon shrugged. "My dad's a jackass. He deserves it. What'd he do anyway?"

"He called Aunt Mary a slut." Pete explained. "He won't stop being an asshole."

"Come on kids!" Officer McDaniels urged them all back onto the field. "We still have a game to play. PC Principal will deal with that jackass."

"Move your ass Baxter!"The Middle Park coach shouted at Simon. "You're father will have my ass if we lose this fucking game!"

XXXX

This was their time to stop slacking off. They now tied with Middle Park and so far no one suspected the Middle Park team of throwing the game. Whenever a kid from the rival team had the ball they would "accidently" throw the ball to someone of the South Park team and lazily chase the person with the ball to make it look as though they were still playing the game even though no one on the Middle Park side was taking the game seriously anymore.

McDaniels dared to look at the scoreboard after PC Principal silenced Mayor Baxter and she had no more tears to cry. She leaned into Barbrady and sighed with relief as she might not have to hold a snake or go on a date with Chief Wright after all.

"Don't hold your breath Mary!"Mayor Baxter snapped at her. "The game isn't over yet. You can still lose!"

"Jackass!"She grumbled bitterly. She would've preferred a better comeback, but she was too busy trying not to throw up she couldn't think properly. She was weak and tired and just wanted to go back to the hotel and take a long nap.

"Come on son!"Mayor Baxter yelled over the railing. The South Park Cows overtook Middle Park on the scoreboard and it was making him nervous. "Don't do this to me!"

Simon smirked as Cartman tackled him to the ground and took the ball from him. After Eric threw the ball to Dovahkiin Hughes Simon turned to face his father and flipped him off. Dovahkiin threw the ball to Butters, who threw it to Kyle who then passed it to Stan so he could score another touchdown.

McDaniels started laughing. She couldn't help herself. As South Park had overtaken Middle Park on the scoreboard she was relieved despite Mayor Baxter's insistence they still had a chance to win.

"It's not funny Mary!"He glowered at her. Or at least that's what she thought he was doing through his squinted swollen eyes.

She didn't care. She wanted to see him pay for calling her a slut earlier. It was bad enough she still felt used after her experience with Randy Marsh. She didn't need assholes like Baxter reminding her of her attack.

His delicate ego couldn't handle the fact that his team was losing the game and it would take a miracle for them to catch up to South Park on the scoreboard. Mayor Baxter raged and called her a slut. He hadn't learned to keep his mouth shut after his run in with PC Principal.

"Don't be such a baby!"She grumbled. She couldn't wait for the game to finish. The last five minutes seemed to drag on forever. She just wanted to go home.

"No!"Mayor Baxter cried when the final whistle blew signalling the end of the game.

"Thank God!"She cried with relief and hugged her husband tightly. The score put South Park at thirty-four leaving Middle Park behind at twenty-two.

"What?"Mayor Baxter's jaw dropped in shock. "This can't be happening!"

"You have to hold a tarantula dad!"His son yelled at him from the field much to the amusement of the children around him.

"What the fuck boy?!"Mayor Baxter shouted at him.

"You're not going to weasel out of our bet are you?"McDaniels raised an eyebrow in suspicion knowing full well he would try and do exactly that.

Baxter sighed in defeat and slumped in his seat. "Fine."

XXXX

They gathered outside the hotel complex and waited for Baxter to follow through with his part of the deal.

"If you didn't want to run naked around the complex you shouldn't have cornered mom to make her go on a date with your police chief."Alex snapped at Baxter who didn't want to take his clothes off.

Baxter sighed and stripped. He ran the two laps and in doing so people from both towns and even his own council roared with hysterical laughter.

"Are we done now?!"He grumbled bitterly after Wright gave him back his clothes.

"No!"McDaniels snapped at him. "You still have to hold the tarantula. That was the deal jackass! You would've insisted I hold the damn snake you _have_ to hold that spider!"

Katherine Holloway shrieked when zookeepers brought the tarantula over in a clear box and sat it in front of Mayor Baxter. She couldn't even sit through this part of the wager she ran off and hid on the bus.

"What the fuck did you lose for boy?!"Baxter snapped at his son who found his father's predicament amusing along with everyone else.

Simon flipped him off. "I want to go to camp!"

"Stop being such a cry baby and hold the damn spider!"McDaniels snapped. As amusing as it was she just wanted to get this over with.

"Mr. Mayor?"The animal handler asked him to hold out his hand as he removed the tarantula from its clear box. He instructed him to hold his palm flat as he gave him the spider to hold.

"See."Simon tapped Stan on the shoulder to get his attention. "I told you he screamed like a woman."

Stan along with the other children and South Park and Middle Park officials roared with hysterical laughter.

McDaniels was standing behind the children and overheard their conversation. "Did you throw the game kid?"She asked curiously.

"I know South Park can win on their own."Simon explained as his father screamed over the spider he had to hold for another two minutes. "But I didn't want to risk winning because I want to go to camp."Simon looked at his father nervously. "You won't tell him will you?"

McDaniels laughed at her rival as his face paled and he shrieked like a woman. "No kid. You saved me from the snake."

XXXX

She was relieved when they were able to go home. She hoped she didn't have to deal with her rival again anytime soon. At this rate it would take her two weeks just to recover from the trip.

They stopped a few times on the way back to town as morning sickness reared its ugly head. Other than a few quick stops on the side of the road the rest of the trip was uneventful. She thanked God the Middle Park team decided to throw the game. She wasn't even mad her own team didn't try and win on their own. She had been spared from public humiliation.

"Dude!"Pete's hysterical laughter snapped her out of her train of thought. "Fat Ass filmed it and the fight with PC Principal."

She laughed hysterically as she watched the videos. Eric Cartman had posted them to Facebook for the world to see. "Serves him right for being a jackass."


End file.
